You may have tried following the no contact rule before and found yourself in one of two situations:
1. You missed your ex so much that you broke it at the worst possible time
2. You followed it for way too long until they have forgotten what your name is
Firstly, if you are trying to win back your ex, the no contact rule must be an important part of your journey. It gives your ex time to miss you, and more importantly it gives you time to improve yourself and your life.
Followed properly you come out of the no contact period a stronger, more confident person, loving their life, and it is at this time that your ex misses you quite a lot. Put these two together and BINGO, your 90% there.
Follow incorrectly the no contact rule means a mind full of stress and depression. A month spent sitting on the couch staring at the phone, trying to put the thought of your ex out of your head in vain.
So no contact sounds simple does it? Well it isn’t, it isn’t meant to be. It will be a tough time for both you and your ex. But each day is money in the bank so to speak. It should go for a period of around one month, and here is the key part, you need to spend that month being active in your life. That is something many “experts” don’t mention. Also another thing that is frequently left out is it is OK the think about your ex, its fine, don’t make yourself an enemy because you find your mind drifting back to them. If you are active eventually the time you think about them will decrease.
You follow the no contact rule to give your ex time to think about you and miss you. As humans we always sugar coat memories so in time you will appear to them in a much better light then straight after the break up.
Time is important! One day of no contact, isn’t the No Contact rule, it’s one day of not talking to your ex. Around one month is the minimum, but don’t drag it one for 2 or 3 months as they will most certainly move on with their lives and slowly forget about you.
Be active in your life! Here is the most important part, even more important then not speaking to your ex. No contact for one month gives you 30 days just for you. Use it to improve yourself, or even just enjoy your life. Life presents opportunities and rewards to those who leave the house and interact with the world. Get outside and do something just for you. Reunite with old friends you may have lost contact with, or even just make a habit to start working out, or going to the beach. Do something you love.
If you have recently broken up with your ex and are thinking about the no contact rule, follow the above advice. I know you can feel that it makes sense, but take action on it. It’s your relationship you are trying to save, not mine.
No Contact is just one part or the massive journey that is winning back an old love, you need to equip yourself with as much information as possible so that your ex does not reject you!